


tragic designs

by haarucchii



Category: Countdown to Countdown (Webcomic)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, M/M, Pre-Slash, Relationship Study, based off a tweet xiao made, bc of the save points, kind of, lillium keeps on dying but he revives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-07-02 06:58:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15791343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haarucchii/pseuds/haarucchii
Summary: iris remembers multiple save points since he left that dinerand he remembers losing lilliumagainand againand again.





	tragic designs

**Author's Note:**

> based on this [tweet](https://twitter.com/velsmells/status/1032770986737840129) xiao/vel made and it's been in my mind ((probs not canon at all but i searched lazily through the comic and made an angsty fic about lillium dying all the time im sorry

It’s the tenth save point after they head out to Seattle and Iris is convinced that Lillium was never meant to be by his side. After his encounter with the Irid poster, he has a reminder of revolutionaries sacrificing themselves for their leaders to further the cause. The cause…

 

Their cause was for spawncampers to stop killing them, to stop treating them like meat and prizes. 

 

It’s soft eyes that look down at Iris that seems like they know everything but say nothing when it comes to his questions. Iris has so, so many questions and he knows that this is only the beginning and his confusion is only temporary until fear and horror controls his mind again.

 

Iris keeps on losing Lillium in moments where it feels like he can trace the path by himself and the latter quips about knowing more than he does even a few days out in the real world. In the end, it’s tight grips before they separate for the night and he’s the first thought in Iris’ mind because he can’t lose him again in this save point, not  _ now–  _

 

And he’s faced with a smiling face that makes Iris believe that the world isn’t at it’s end. The fact that any moment of relaxation is met with the fear of a spawn camper staying in the trees or hiding out in the river or waiting to take Lillium away from him at any chance they get. The taste of ink feels more familiar in his mouth than the taste of cooked fish over a fire or the much needed taste of breakfast foods. 

 

 _We’re a team,_ Lillium’s voice rings through Iris’ head as he sees another gory end to a man he thinks is his friend. His teammate. _We should try to be honest with each other._ But Lillium knows more than he lets off, Iris knows. He chooses his words carefully and he censors himself around Iris even after he realizes that the last Iris that Lillium dealt with was most likely Irid. He closes his eyes and thinks of the little hints and the thoughtful words that Lillium says to not instill any more fear and anxiety in Iris’ head.

 

Which,  _ rude,  _ because he can handle himself even if the outside is a lot more different than he would’ve expected. But he know the apocalypse never holds back. His dreams of fire and fear slowly changes to nightmares of ripped skin and pale arms even paler and empty eyes that are deemed useless even if Iris found them beautiful. 

 

The best thing about this pain is that he never survives long after Lillium dies, because his limbs are too short and his lungs are too weak and he freezes up and his body seizes in fear. It’s a numbing sensation and Lillium is always there again to help him through it. 

 

Maybe it’s something cursed with demifloras. Something that counteracts their powers and because they can’t just be blessed with being hunted. 

 

Iris has his nightmares and fears, and Lillium has his infinite lives that he seems to also relive when Iris looks at him with tears welling up and a snarky comment on his tongue to his hide feelings. 

 

The question is clear in his head and Iris always choses the same answer. 

 

_ Game Over _ __  
**_> Continue_ ** **_  
_ ** __ > Quit

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> this is unedited and written in like an hour so sorry for disgracing this canon thanks for ctc xiao i love it and sorry for that iris x leaf fic i wrote a year ago


End file.
